More Narks Than Coppers

I was sitting on the train this morning, looking out the window and pondering why I write fiction, when I was distracted. A man stumbled down the aisle of the carriage, proclaiming, “Tickets! Tickets! Tickets!” I turned, and noticed that all down the carriage people had their wallets in their hands and open before they realised that he wasn’t, in fact, a ticket inspector. Ummm… duh! It’s the train journey. Numbs your brain. Anyway, he sat down near me and, when he’d caught my eye, explained –

“There’s more narks than coppers! More narks than coppers.”

Uh huh.

“Ho Ho Ho! Ugly Hos everywhere!”

Ummm… you better not be talking to me, pal! I look over – he’s staring into space. Who knows? Maybe he doesn’t like bright red hair.

Then he comes out with something I can definitely agree with -

(sung) “There’s a slowww traaaain coming,”
(spoken aside) “Translink. Fuckers”

Heheheh.