Sex Toys for Newlyweds

I’m pondering what to buy the friend who’s getting married soon. I want something quirky, but useful. Since he’s quite sexually liberated (for a 40yo virgin), I was thinking of getting him some sexy stuff. Like an edible bra, or a boardgame where you roll the dice and move your piece over your partner’s body.

The problem is, this sort of stuff is often really, really bad quality. It’s as if producers have the idea that because a piece of chocolate’s in the shape of a penis, it’s allowed to taste like crap. Or maybe they think they’re catching two markets with the one product. Eurgh. Mental images OUT of head. And another problem – I don’t know his fiance. For all I know she’s a classic sweet, innocent christian girl. I doubt it, but she could be!

Here’s what’s currently on my shortlist:


Monogamy Board Game

According to the blurb:

Monogamy can be played on a number of different levels, depending on how you both feel. If you feel like a romantic and fun night, you can play at the first two levels. If you’re both feeling naughty, just shuffle the fantasy cards and go for it! With over 400 ideas at three progressive levels and fifty fantasies, the game can be enjoyed over and over! The game climaxes after the first player to makes it around the board 3 times – they win the chance to have one of their fantasy cards played out. So there are no losers in Monogamy.

Hmmmm.. sounds as though it could be decent.


Candy Posing Pouch
Too scary?


8 Responses

  1. the uh…. candy pouch…….. is just………. oh my gwad thats just way farkin scary!!

  2. LOL

    I think he’d happily wear it, though… I’m just not sure what it’d do to his sex life…

  3. well it would get a giggle even if it didn’t get a nibble! lol

  4. Hehe… hopefully! I just… dang it all, I know too many strait-laced good lil christian girls who’d run screaming. But surely my mate wouldn’t end up with someone like that? The guy who streaked at a mate’s wedding for a laugh?

  5. yeah, its strange……….. I hope he didn’t too.

    Funnily enough a lot of the most interesting conversations I’ve ever had about sex have been with christian ladies……….. but they were mature enough to understand that it’s allowed to be fun and funny! lol

  6. Yeah, I think i’ve been hanging out on christian forums too much. Many american christians, most of them frothing fundies.

  7. yes those frothing fundies tend to be a little……… well repressed and guilty

  8. You forgot angry that other people get to have fun 😉

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: