I was reading WiddleShamrock’s discussion of being ‘in recovery’ when I realised just how I’ve been looking at my past. As if there was a ‘me’ back in the day who was slim, muscly, energetic, balanced, sensible, fun… What a load of bulltwang. Sure, there were times when I was more energetic. Thank God. There were times when I was much more social. Throwing parties, etc. But I was also often miserable, stupid and just plain thoughtless. Here’s what I wrote on WS’s post:

Something that I’m only just realising is that the ‘me’ that I keep looking back on with longing is viewed with extremely rose-coloured glasses. The ‘me’ today is actually a superior model, all things considered… it’s the me of tomorrow that I need to be working on, rather than trying to get back to some mythical past.

It may not seem like much of a difference. But to me it’s the difference between attempting a vague and unrealistic ‘once upon a time’ and ‘being the best damn me I can be’. That doesn’t mean I stop trying to get better. It means I try harder and get less discouraged, because I have a world of opportunities to go after. I’m not stuck with trying to be some idealised person I never was anyway.

Thanks, Widdle Shamrock!


6 Responses

  1. Wow,

    I needed to let go of who I thought I should be and what I perceived people wanted me to be.

    Crazy stuff !!!

  2. holy shit! Naomi, you are really my “smack me over the head with the truth” moment person!!

  3. I second that, B.

  4. Naomi that is a brilliant quote – very perceptive of you .I hope the me of tomorrow has more energy and is a lot more patience .
    I want to be a better person too.

    is Bubba boy recovered ?

  5. Yes, very perceptive and also thought provoking. THANK YOU! 🙂

  6. Thanks gals *hugs* Now let’s see if I can actually DO it, or just rabbit on about it? 🙂

    Trish – Bubba Boy is fully recovered and back to his usual chaos-causing and musical composing!

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