My Wedding Story

Being the thoroughly nasty wench that I am, I left a comment on Gemisht’s blog, and got everyone curious about what the hell I did to put my husband in hospital.

Well… you know those kickboxing lessons..?

Absolutely nothing to do with it.

Just for once, lemme start at the beginning.

How We Met

I was sixteen. He was a cradle-snatching nineteen.

We met – get this – on a christian camp. Halfway between where we each lived at the time.

It was love at first sight. It was a freezing, highland winter’s night, and he was in shorts and bare feet. I thought, “Now there’s a nutcase I could fall for!”

He thought, “Oh look, a person.” Dammit.

We got talking… and talking… and talking… and before we knew, it was dawn. We kissed a bit. Then we exchanged phone numbers and surnames, ate brekky and went home.

How It Went SPLAT

We had a long distance relationship (much to the dismay of my father) for 1.5 years. Then I moved to his neck of the woods for university, and it all went horribly wrong. We were young and dumb. We had no idea how to carry on a healthy relationship. So eventually I broke it off and ran away to Queensland and got pregnant. Did I mention I was dumb?

The Unsplatting

Years later, I called an old friend. I’d lost touch with all my friends from that time period. But I called this friend because I knew he wouldn’t be shocked or outraged at the stuff I’d done. I knew he’d just be glad to hear from me.

He was. And then he said, “Hey, <hubby’s name> is staying here tonight, why don’t you say hi?” Oh dear God. I wanted to scream “NOOO!” but he’d already passed over the phone. So we had an uncomfortable conversation about – I have no idea what about.

Eventually we got back in touch, got more comfortable with each other, and became friends. It took years, but it happened.

Romance Rekindles

One day I looked at this ex-fiance mate of mine and thought, “He’s a bit of alright, actually!”


Talk about terrifying myself.

To put it briefly (so this post doesn’t turn ridiculously long), I thought it through for months. I looked at our personalities: a fairly good match. I looked at our characters: a good match, although mine needed some catchup work. I looked at our values: ridiculously good match. I looked at the reasons we broke up, and did some major soul-searching about whether those were just going to resurface. Then I went down for a visit, bought some liqueur chocolates, flirted my butt off and snogged him. Then I asked if he’d be interested in getting back together.

The Wedding

A suitable period of time later, we got engaged again. Then we got married. On the beach on Stradbroke Island, if you’re interested 😉

The Day After

I guess I wore him out TOO much 🙂 Either that, or he decided to test out the ‘in sickness’ bit of the vows.

Hubby has epilepsy. And a combination of stress, excitement (I hope) and not taking his meds or eating the previous day (due to said stress and excitement) caused him to have a seizure the next afternoon. So once he was stabilised but not yet come around, I went looking for a phone to call an ambulance to check him over. We didn’t have one in our holiday house. Next door (also a holiday house) did – I could see it lying on the counter. But no-one answered my knocking. Grr. So I checked in on hubby, told him what had happened (you had a fit, you’re OK, I’m looking for a phone to get someone to check you over), and went looking for someone who might be staying nearby. Or have mobile access out there. The first people I met were a guy and his 3 kids. They were staying next door (the place with the phone) – yay! He said his wife was there, just knock loudly. OK. So I ran up to our house, checked on hubby, told him what had happened (you had a fit, you’re OK, I’m looking for a phone to get someone to check you over), then went next door again. Knocked my lil heart out. No answer. Damn shy people! So I checked in on hubby again and re-updated him (you had a fit, you’re OK, I’m looking for a phone to get someone to check you over). Then went down to the beach again, recornered the guy playing with his kids, and explained that his wife wasn’t answering the door. Lovely guy – he packed up his kids without a murmur and took me to the phone. Right. The ambulance operator said someone would be out ASAP.

I re-explained the situation to hubby, made him laugh (knew he was back in his head then), and went to pack. I’ve been in emergency wards enough by now to know that if you can, you pack. Food, drink, money, book, music, etc. The ambulance arrived and took us to Straddie’s hospital. The doctor arrived not long afterwards and unlocked the door. We went in, doctor checked him over, and said, “Yup, he’s fine – off you go!” Wow. Packing all in vain. The lovely ambulance driver gave us a lift back to our holiday house… phew… I hadn’t been looking forward to finding how to get back, considering we were in a whole ‘nother town!

There you go. The story of hubby’s hospitalisation the day after we got married 🙂 And a bit extra.

8 Responses

  1. So now we know.

    Glad to hear that he was OK. Did you find out why the wife wasn’t answering the door after all that knocking?????

    And thanks for sharing how you met etc.

  2. Awwww, that’s a sweet story.

    And I love the photo too. Is that your hot hunk offering ??

  3. you are too nice. I would have kicked MPS while he was down screaming something about stealing my thunder, I was a freaking BRIDE and ruining my holiday.

    But I am a biatch like that.

    (you know I am kidding right? Sorta)

  4. cool.

    Great story.

    LURV your pic!

  5. You shagged him into a seizure!

    Hot damn! You Christian babes are feeeeeeeeeeeeelthy critters. 😉

    And I love your dress. Seriously adore it.

    That would work with Doc Martens. Beautiful dress.

  6. Gemisht: Guess she was just shy. Some people are like that!

    WS: Yup, that’ll have to suffice… even though I’m covering most of him!

    Kelley: LOL. I’ve told him that I just claim it was a fit after beating the crud outta him 😛

    Bettina: We had an awesome photographer. Cost us $80.

    Anja: We store up a LOT of sexual frustration 😛 And the dress WAS awesome. From a hippy shop, of course 😉

  7. Love the dress, great taste there Naomi 😉
    Poor hubby, glad to hear he survived your wild wedding night intact, after all 😛

  8. Thanks Jayne 🙂 He’s had a few more brushes with death, of course 😉

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