Screw-Up Tuesday

Mistress B hosts Screw-Up Tuesday every week.

Because I’m a lazy git, I’m not posting anything brain-worthy this week, so recounting my screw-ups aint gonna happen because I’d have to cudgel poor squidgy brain to remember them in the first place. HOWEVER…

In the spirit of Screw-Up Tuesday I bring you… a LOLCAT!!!

The Other Crocs

Just for Scott:

Saltwater Crocodile

Freshwater Crocodile

(moar funny pictures)

Crocs

In honour of Magneto Bold Too –

Ipswich and Holes

Man, this is like shooting fish in a barrel.

A large black hole appeared in one of Ipswich’s most important intersections today.

Need I say more??

Link to news story

Update

I can’t vouch for this information, because it’s third-hand and a little grubby, but it does make a lot of sense. Gotta love taxi drivers, they’re the tinkers (in news-spreading terms) of our modern world!

Apparently, there’s an evacuation? tunnel running from the hospital to the riverside. Was built – or renovated – around the time of the second world war. Hence the odd reference, in the news article, to a girder put it by American forces. And, for that matter, hence the collapse.

Adoption Celebration

In honour of all those who adopted a word from the English language recently, to hug and hold and squish and cuddle and use:

Hehe.

(yes, that is modified slightly)

I’m Sorry…

Hehe.

Am I Well-Read? AM I??

I saw this over on Riayn’s blog, and thought I’d have a crack. See, the BBC published its Top 100 Books list, and apparently theorised that most people would have read a maximum of 6 of them.

So in an exercise of pure self-indulgence – apart from the very last point, which is important – I’ve bolded the ones I’ve read:

1 Pride and Prejudice – Jane Austen (love Jane Austen)
2 The Lord of the Rings – JRR Tolkien (ahhh, I still remember tthe joy of discovering high school library…)
3 Jane Eyre – Charlotte Bronte
4 Harry Potter series – JK Rowling (hasn’t everyone? *lol*)
5 To Kill a Mockingbird – Harper Lee (although long enough ago that I don’t remember much of it)
6 The Bible (bit of a no-brainer, really – if you’re going to believe something, you might as well read the closest thing to what your God’s been trying to tell people, right?)
7 Wuthering Heights – Emily Bronte (dear god – well-written but bloody depressing. And irritating. “Heathcliffe!” “Cathy!” *snort*)
8 Nineteen Eighty Four – George Orwell (I always get this and Brave New World mixed up in my head, for some weird reason…)
9 His Dark Materials – Philip Pullman
10 Great Expectations – Charles Dickens (but possibly in ‘readers digest’ form)
11 Little Women – Louisa M Alcott (first read it at a ridiculously young age, and always loved it. And the sequels!)
12 Tess of the D’Urbervilles – Thomas Hardy (but not for years and years)
13 Catch 22 – Joseph Heller (how embarrassing, keep meaning to read it and have never gotten round to it)
14 Complete Works of Shakespeare
15 Rebecca – Daphne Du Maurier
16 The Hobbit – JRR Tolkien (funny book! my fave of his)
17 Birdsong – Sebastian Faulk
18 Catcher in the Rye – JD Salinger (but hardly remember a thing about it)
19 The Time Traveller’s Wife – Audrey Niffenegger
20 Middlemarch – George Eliot (another depressing effort, but with bright bits!)
21 Gone With The Wind – Margaret Mitchell (interesting book! gave me some insight into american race relations)
22 The Great Gatsby – F Scott Fitzgerald (know what I remember about this book? the narrator talking about his (soon to be ex) girlfriend and her sweat-moustache… 😀 )
23 Bleak House – Charles Dickens
24 War and Peace – Leo Tolstoy
25 The Hitch Hiker’s Guide to the Galaxy – Douglas Adams (Awwww… love these books for light amusement! Especially the way Adams got so frustrated by requests for more stories that he killed the characters, then blew up all possible alternates of those characters and all possible alternate earths, just to get the message across! 😀 )
26 Brideshead Revisited – Evelyn Waugh (just read this very recently – still pondering. College-age boy who talks to his teddy-bear in public… hrm.)
27 Crime and Punishment – Fyodor Dostoyevsky
28 Grapes of Wrath – John Steinbeck
29 Alice in Wonderland – Lewis Carroll (a bit more disturbing once I read all the Lewis/Alice backstory)
30 The Wind in the Willows – Kenneth Grahame (for some reason, I always disliked this intensely as a kid. haven’t read it again recently)
31 Anna Karenina – Leo Tolstoy (somehow, I don’t find this book depressing at all. Odd)
32 David Copperfield – Charles Dickens
33 Chronicles of Narnia – CS Lewis (loved these books as a kid. quite liked them as an adult too 🙂 )
34 Emma – Jane Austen (awwww… dopey interfering chick who thinks she knows it all… do I see myself in her maybe??)
35 Persuasion – Jane Austen (awwww… reminds me of hubby and i!)
36 The Lion, The Witch and The Wardrobe – CS Lewis
37 The Kite Runner – Khaled Hosseini
38 Captain Corelli’s Mandolin – Louis De Bernieres
39 Memoirs of a Geisha – Arthur Golden (sparked a lonnnng fascination with japanese culture)
40 Winnie the Pooh – AA Milne (ummm… cute but cloying at times)
41 Animal Farm – George Orwell (first came across this as a cartoon!)
42 The Da Vinci Code – Dan Brown
43 One Hundred Years of Solitude – Gabriel Garcia Marquez
44 A Prayer for Owen Meany – John Irving
45 The Woman in White – Wilkie Collins
46 Anne of Green Gables – LM Montgomery (another one of those childhood favourites)
47 Far From The Madding Crowd – Thomas Hardy (very sad in parts – but I like his writing 🙂 )
48 The Handmaid’s Tale – Margaret Atwood
49 Lord of the Flies – William Golding (*shudder)
50 Atonement – Ian McEwan
51 Life of Pi – Yann Martel
52 Dune – Frank Herbert (sequels just not as good, somehow)
53 Cold Comfort Farm – Stella Gibbons
54 Sense and Sensibility – Jane Austen (friend and I both like this book – but we identify with different characters :-D)
55 A Suitable Boy – Vikram Seth
56 The Shadow of the Wind – Carlos Ruiz Zifon
57 A Tale Of Two Cities – Charles Dickens
58 Brave New World – Aldous Huxley (must read this again some time)
59 The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-time – Mark Haddon
60 Love In The Time Of Cholera – Gabriel Garcia Marquez
61 Of Mice and Men – John Steinbeck
62 Lolita – Vladimir Nabokov(another very recent read – weird but compelling writing)
63 The Secret History – Donna Tartt
64 The Lovely Bones – Alice Sebold
65 Count of Monte Cristo – Alexandre Dumas
66 On The Road – Jack Kerouac
67 Jude the Obscure – Thomas Hardy
68 Bridget Jones’s Diary – Helen Fielding (thought I’d read this years ago. ‘reread’ it recently, and found I hadn’t. Odd. Much more like Pride and Prejudice than the movie is)
69 Midnight’s Children – Salman Rushdie
70 Moby Dick – Herman Melville (this was a tough one!)
71 Oliver Twist – Charles Dickens (I like Dickens. Funny and insightful)
72 Dracula – Bram Stoker
73 The Secret Garden – Frances Hodgson Burnett
74 Notes From A Small Island – Bill Bryson (Bryson is a HOOT. Suspect him of lying through his teeth, but at least he’s funny)
75 Ulysses – James Joyce
76 The Inferno – Dante
77 Swallows and Amazons – Arthur Ransome
78 Germinal – Emile Zola
79 Vanity Fair – William Makepeace Thackeray (must be unmemorable. know I’ve read it, that’s it)
80 Possession – AS Byatt
81 A Christmas Carol – Charles Dickens (again with the Dickens!)
82 Cloud Atlas – David Mitchell
83 The Color Purple – Alice Walker
84 The Remains of the Day – Kazuo Ishiguro
85 Madame Bovary – Gustave Flaubert
86 A Fine Balance – Rohinton Mistry
87 Charlotte’s Web – EB White (meh)
88 The Five People You Meet In Heaven – Mitch Albom
89 Adventures of Sherlock Holmes – Sir Arthur Conan Doyle
90 The Faraway Tree Collection – Enid Blyton (awww… loved this as a kid. sad that some people I know won’t let their kids read it)
91 Heart of Darkness – Joseph Conrad
92 The Little Prince – Antoine De Saint-Exupery
93 The Wasp Factory – Iain Banks
94 Watership Down – Richard Adams
95 A Confederacy of Dunces – John Kennedy Toole
96 A Town Like Alice – Nevil Shute
97 The Three Musketeers – Alexandre Dumas (hard to read as a young teen with no idea of the historical period in question!)
98 Hamlet – William Shakespeare (thanks, high school! you did one thing right. ish.)
99 Charlie and the Chocolate Factoy – Roald Dahl (Roald Dahl! Genius of a man)
100 Les Miserables – Victor Hugo (the git starts a chapter (about 2/3 in) talking about a particular battle in the French Revolution. if your copy includes it, trust me, skip the WHOLE CHAPTER. It’s completely irrelevant. Not a single plot point or reference to characters. gah!)

QLD Election and Nudity – NSFW

What the HELL is it with Queensland politicians and taking off their clothes for the cameras???

Not that I mind overly much. I’m not sitting here with my lips pursed, looking like I just ate 15 lemons in a row. It’s just… odd. Is it the weather? It IS much warmer here than in most states. Can you imagine pulling the old ‘let’s rip off the kilt!’ maneouvre in Canberra?

Want a summary?

Warwick Capper – Proposed Candidate for Beaudesert

OMG this boy is a bogan! 😀

Pauline Hanson – Candidate for Beaudesert

Apparently, this isn’t Pauline. Frankly, I don’t think so either. And I think one of the funniest things about the whole uproar is the idea that this is ‘bad’ for a political candidate.

Lawrence Springborg

Dave Zwolenski – Candidate for Mt Coot-tha

Anna Bligh

Sadly, this is about as ‘nude’ as Anna seems to get when there are cameras about:

And other random ‘clothes off for the cause’ moments:

Traveston Dam Protest

How Could You Resist Voting for Him?

Bahahaha!!!

Election Giggles

You wouldn’t think that the Queensland election would give people that much to laugh about, would you?

But first there was Warwick Capper, ‘planning’ to run against Pauline Hanson in Beaudesert:

Which was, I believe, just a marketing ploy by Zoo weekly. Hmmm… wonder how many men bought their latest edition hoping for (more) naked photos of Warwick?

Then there’s the Daylight Savings for South-East Queensland party. With their ‘hilarious’, ‘Chaser-like’ stunt – See here for the side-splittingly unfunny story. I’ve had a bit of a conversation with these guys – see what you think:

Nomesque: @ds4seq Have your candidates specified any other policies or interests they’d be supporting if voted in? #qldelection09

ds4seq: @Nomesque No, we only have one policy (introduction of DS into SEQ) and we intend to only comment on that issue! #qldelection09

Nomesque: @ds4seq Hmm… you expect ppl to care so much about DS that they won’t care what else ur candidates believe in?? #qldelection09

ds4seq: @Nomesque No. That’s the great thing about optional pref voting! Vote us 1 and vote 2 for whoever you want for other issues! #QldElection09

Nomesque: @ds4seq Pref voting theory works wonderfully if ur candidates don’t get in. Must presume u’re not planning to win seats? #qldelection09

ds4seq: @Nomesque What’s that old saying – nothing ventured, nothing gained!! Like your site btw – tnx for the tips. #qldelection09

Nomesque: @ds4seq Welcome. Glad they were useful! But hey, work on ur spiel a bit? ‘vote 4 us cos we won’t win’ isn’t good enuff. 😉 #qldelection09

*chuckle* OK, so I’m a bitch. But I think I’ve got a damn good point there. While I know that single-interest parties are far from rare, surely you’d have to be ridiculously single-minded to vote in someone knowing only one of their policies and beliefs. For all I know, my electorate’s candidate (if successful) could suddenly start campaigning for a huge dam to be built, drowning the entire electorate. Because hey, he doesn’t live there anyway! *snort*

Oh well. If nothing else, this whole circus is a great way to prove to everyone that while the weather may be ‘sunny one day, perfect the next’, there are lots of great reasons to stay the HELL away! 😉